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Ian’s history does not fall short of many of the experiences other young horses have gone through. For many of us we could not imagine this on a specially bred horse; one that would become a family member for as long as he was with us but stuff happens in this horse world of horses when influenced by others the best care for our foals. Ian had been castrated at the early age of seven days. It was a newly thought up concept that apparently it was healthier for the foal to take care of this surgery ASAP if he was to go through this procedure later down the road. I would say a complete mistake as would the owner today. Ian has since this time had issues with his hind end and will kick out if one gets too close to him. Could it be built up scar tissue that has not healed? Or could it be emotional damage done due to the trauma of this surgery? Or could it be both? All I knew was that after attending a beautiful week long workshop which I had just departed from, working with horses as teachers where they ran freely in a herd on 330 acres, I new Ian had definitely suffered emotional trauma and with my knowledge of the healing of scar tissue, he more than likely had issues there too.
Spending time over the past few days in a stall enclosed with four walls and being recently taken away from the small herd of colts he had grown up with, Ian stood there skeptical not wanting to be handled, particularly around his face and neck area. He had recently been brought up to the big barn to start his training and was left tied in a stall with a rope halter; a rope halter that ultimately caused damage to his neck with visual wounds over his nose and behind his ears. Even with his pulling and wanting to be freed from this confinement, no one attended. Well, perhaps they did but this was a discipline for him to accept his coming into a new world as a working horse under saddle. Ian was only two years of age at this point in time and I am sure he had no idea that this was supposed to be the plan for him. He refused to stand still and with this continually pulled so hard that raw skin mixed in with his fur began to swell on his face. Still he would not stand, fearful of the accelerated pain he was experiencing.
When I stepped into his stall he in no way wanted me to touch these areas of pain. I immediately felt my heart tugging, not to go away from this experience emotionally but connecting more deeply with him while beginning to understand what it was he had gone through after being told about his history. I began to feel as traumatized as he did. I offered some essential oils but they really didn’t seem to make much of a difference so I just laid my hands on his neck. We connected for a few moments this way and during this time could feel his head pressing into the front of my chest, resting quietly; the connection had been made. Moments later he lifted his head and stood back, he then reached forward with his lips and gently grabbed my t-shirt and began tugging on it while making contact with the area of my thymus (which is known to be a newly emerging charka). As I felt this pressure I was suddenly brought back to this place of where I was only a few days earlier; lying on a massage table in a big paddock where the herd roamed freely. I was receiving a gift from a shamanic healer from the insights coming from the place of nature and in the moment we came to clarity together of what I had discovered within myself, one of the herd members came over and insistently started tugging on my sweater, biting gently beneath it so as to stimulate this area of my thymus. This experience brought both my shamanic teacher and myself to tears. So, hear I was again, only days later reliving this experience with another horse who came to me in this moment begging to be understood and for me not to harm him.
I soon realized as truth what I had most recently learned that we are all one in the oneness of things be it a horse, human, tree or rock on the land. How could this experience happen to me so soon after a weekend workshop where I was connecting to the land, nature and the animals that co-habitate with it? These kinds of questions that I impose upon myself I rarely seek the answers for. It is more of learning to accept the feeling of what comes from these kinds of experiences. Did Ian get the opportunity to receive the gift of body work from me that day? Yes he did although he still had issues to work on with his hind end. I know with the proper maintenance care that he needs, he will be able to break free from the emotional and physical trauma he has experienced since birth though, no doubt about it.
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